Update

Nothing much new to report... I've got a few busy weeks coming up. Starting with my brothers wedding this weekend, a doctor's appointment next week, an art show Mr. SuZ is showing in (and hopefully selling photos), lots of stuff! It's exhausting just thinking about it.

We got approval to get a mortgage yesterday, so all we have to do now is find that perfect house. I'm dying to find something that I can start nesting in, and I'm sure my dogs would love more room than what we have now.

Besides all that, not a damn thing is new... and we like it that way. :)

I'll update more when something exciting happens.

VAA-CAAH

I'm on a mini break at the moment, holed up in a beautiful hotel in Savannah, Georgia... and I'm in heaven. :)

My feet still hurt though. :) :) :)

Ups and Downs

The best thing about pregnancy is the ups and downs it throws you.

One minute, I'm fine... perfectly fine and the next, I'm blowing my top and in tears. Yesterday the toilet overflowed and I couldn't find the value to turn it off, so after tracking down the hubby I found it and while I was mopping up toilet water from the bedroom floor, the tears just wouldn't stop... I was a mess for a good solid 15 minutes.

Or there was the time when the dogs wouldn't listen to me and darted out of the house, jumped in my truck, trampled all over Mr. SuZ's photo props and then proceeded to ignore me as I tried to drag them out of the truck... I was pissed for an hour about that one.

Or what about the book I read yesterday that had me in an emotional turmoil for the first 150 pages?

Sheesh... I am a mess, huh?

But I'm growing a life inside of me... My husband and I have created a person and he/she is moving around in my belly letting me keep it safe until it's ready to meet the world. :)

*sigh*

When you think about those kinds of emotions, the good ones that make you smile and feel all warm and mushy inside... that's when the tears and the anger slip away and put your world back on its axis.

One Down... Many To Go

Friday night I experienced my first ever "you're pregnant and can't do what we can do" episode.

So here's the jist. I went and got my nails done with two of my very best girlfriends and was under the impression we would either grab dinner afterwards or hit the stores.

So I join them at the nail salon, have a wonderful experience and while we're all in our chairs getting our toes done, I ask what was on the agenda for the evening, maybe dinner?

The both turn to one another and start talking about bars they want to go to and yada yada yada. Okay, I think... maybe they're just chit chatting.

So after we're all done, they mention the bars again and by now I'm frustrated, simply b/c I'd been out of town for 8 friggin' weeks and all I wanted to do was get together with them and hang out. Do the girlie stuff we're known for and catch up.

We departed ways with promises of calls and whatnot.

About eight o'clock I get the call:

"I know you've got that whole pregnancy thing going on, but... we're going to the bar. You're welcome to come, but..."

Yeah, I got the hint.

Then came the next blow:

"But tell Mr. SuZ and maybe he'll come up and hang out with us?"

'Cuse me?

You don't want to hang out with me in a preggo-friendly environment, yet you want my husband to drop me and hang out with you?

Is it me, or is this insane for even mentioning?

Not that I have a big deal about my husband hanging out with my friends, no big deal, does it all the time... but come on? I'm pregnant now, we're a package deal.

*rolls eyes*

Am I coming off as pyscho? Paranoid? An idiot pregnant woman?

My feelings were just really hurt, b/c I really wanted to hang out with them and I got dumped.

Woe is me.

Warning.

Someone stick a sticker on me that says: BAD MOOD.

I think it all started because I slept like crap last night. I was out like a light for about four to five hours, then I started tossing and turning. Not one single position (choosing from the only two I'm technically allowed to lay in) was comfortable. Or Mr. SuZ was complaining that I was hogging the bed. I tried to shake it off and took my walk this morning, only to discover that it was blistering hot out and my ipod was going dead. At this point I'm thinking, I can handle this. I'm a big girl.

So we go out for a quick breakfast (the fridge where we are staying is on the fritz making me unable to keep anything worth cooking in it), come back and while Mr. SuZ hits the gym I decide to clean the place up, mop the floors and all that yummy stuff. Of course while I'm cleaning the dogs decide to be assholes and run outside and then back inside only to track in dirt. Then Mr. SuZ's grandma comes in, tracking in more mud. At this point I'm fuming... so I made my escape to the library where I'm comfortably sitting amid strangers in the a/c typing away.

Oh the joys.

Lost without Internet

You never really know what you've got until you've lost it...

Easy access to the internet, I miss you. Please, come back.

Since we sold our house and have been on the move, internet access is very (VERY!!) hard to come by. When I had constant, always on, internet access at home I always heard about places to get it for free and yada yada yada... So I go and lose my connection only to realize they were full of crap and I can't find free wi-fi anywhere!!

So here I sit at my local library, happy to have 34 remaining minutes left of my daily usage.

I cannot wait to get settled down again.

Life for us has been hectic. We returned to the Sunshine State and its hot weather with broad smiles on our faces. We're staying at my husband's grandfather's farm while we look for a permanent place to park our butts. We've got our eyes on two properties and they're both under 200K.

I never thought the day when I'd get excited about a house for under 200K. Two years ago, I'd freak out and faint. Today I'm jumping for joy that I've even found anything so cheap... *rolls eyes* Where has my sanity gone?

I moved my sonogram appointment up to the 6th so we'll learn the sex of our baby sooner than we thought. WOO HOO. I've got my brother's wedding and all the festivities starting on the 2nd of November so we'll be really busy until after the 7th. Oh joy... my swollen feet can hardly wait. :) :) :)

I'm out.

Doctor Visit # 3 was today. All tests came back good, my sugar looks good, my blood pressure is excellent and I've only gained seven pounds since my last visit (eight pounds total since conception). :) And I heard it today... it being my baby's heartbeat. :) :) :) :) :) It was so fast, about 150 beats per minute. I just looked at my husband and sighed, we created that!!!

It was perfect.

The doctor was in a hurry today though and quickly measured my belly, said everything was great and high tailed it from the room. He did order a quad test though, to see if there's any defects of any sort going on with the baby. At our next appointment we'll get the results and we'll also find out the sex of the baby (FINALLY!)

Sometimes I still find it so hard to believe we're having a baby... it feels so strange. I can't really explain it, but we've been together so long and we did everything in order, but it still feels like we're 16... Odd, huh?

Things I love about being pregnant:

these big boobs (it's Mr. SuZ's favorite thing about pregnancy too)
having cravings and not having to explain them
sexual cravings
gaining weight and not explaining it :)
getting 10 hours of sleep a day

Things I hate about being pregnant:
acne
dry, itchy skin
I can't touch my toes anymore
certain sexual positions that aren't allowed anymore...
not being able to sleep on my back

Things with my mother have gotten better... the other morning she called me into her room and asked me again if we were moving back to Florida. I told her that no matter what we decide, she is still a part of my baby's life and yada yada yada. She asked me about Mr. SuZ's family and I told her that no matter what, they are his family and we have to deal with it. She seemed to get the point that we're going to go where we are comfortable and where we can find work and a place to live... that we just can't stay where she wants us to, just because she wants us close.

So things are better in that arena.

Other than that, not much is going on. I spent today goofing off and we took the boat out on the lake, but we got about a mile into the trip and the sun disappeared and it got really cold. Maybe tomorrow the sun will grace us with its presence.

I'm on a mission to rejuvinate my creativity. I bought a book called, "See Jane Write" about writing chick lit and since I enjoy reading chick lit so much, I figured why not. We'll see if it actually helps (but first I'm gobbling up the Marie Antoinette bio by Antonia Fraser).

We head to FL on Wednesday. I'm so excited to see all of my friends. They won't believe the bump I've got growing on me!! :) :)

I still haven't felt the baby kick or move or any of that great stuff people swore I'd be feeling by the 4th month. I'm a bit worried I'll miss it when it happens. I have no clue what it's going to feel like, or what to expect. Eck.

That's all for today's update... sorry it's not too exciting.

Writer Block... it sucks. Or maybe it's the growing baby in my belly that sucks (not really) but ever since I got pregnant I haven't felt the slightest bit creative. I'll open up a journal or a notebook and stare at the blank pages... and they haunt me. Nothing drives me up the wall more than a blank piece of paper. It's just not normal, paper was made to be written on. But lately... nada... nothing... and I just want to pull my hair out. I want to scream to the heavens or beg for creative to strike me.

Maybe this blog will help?

Hopefully?

Please?

Ahhhh...

I just hit my 16 week mark today and according to www.pregnancy.com , my baby (girl or boy) will double in weight and length this week (YAY!). Which means more pushing and stretching in my belly, more ripped stomach muscles and more pain.

Ah, the joys of motherhood, huh? ;)

I've got a DR appointment on Tuesday and I'm praying for the identification of sex. I'm DYING, dying I tell you, to buy something... anything!

I'm also dying for a home... ever since my husband and I left FL two months ago we've been some wandering fools. We've gone everywhere from FL to SC to MO to NC... It's exhausting (and expensive, mind you). I want a place to start nesting, to start decorating... a comfortable bed that is MINE. I'm ready for hot showers every night, food whenever I want or need it. I'm ready for a place to park my ever growing ass and enjoy my own furniture... is that too much to ask?

Apparently so.

We'll be heading to FL in four days to figure out what to do with our new lives... my Mother is begging us not to stay in FL. She wants us in SC, where she can watch me get bigger and order us around (don't you just love mothers?). My husband would shoot me if I suggested we stay. The truth is, I'm a FL girl. I LOVE scourching heat, sun, sand and flip flops. I'm a native as well as my husband and we need that humidity to breathe properly. Just don't tell that to my mother, who still thinks that I'm her youngest daughter and at 26 still needs her direction.

Any suggestions on how to polietly tell her to back off?